05
Thu
February
Conversations With My Mother
A Novel of Dementia on the Maine Coast
by Ronald-Stéphane Gilbert (Author)
$19.99
Inspired by the author’s family’s experience, the story of an elegant, elderly Francophone who is struggling with dementia as her small Maine town succumbs to real-estate development. The book is as much about gain as loss and more about hope and appreciation than about regret and despair.
Description
On a clear day in Maine, Yvette Allaire, an elderly French-Canadian woman, and her son Rob, who’s visiting her from his home in the Midwest, drive to the beach where Rob’s late father proposed to her 60 years earlier. Walking along a shoreside road, steadying herself on Rob’s arm as they watch fishermen cast lines from a breakwater so long it seems almost infinite, she reflects on her lost vitality and muses that, while every road might lead somewhere, it isn’t always where one wants to be.
Over the course of the summer on southern Maine’s crowded, steadily gentrifying coast, Rob and his sister Diane, Yvette’s live-in caregiver, notice that their formerly alert and discerning mother seems more and more confused, and they worry that she might be in the first stages of dementia. Initially, as they escort Yvette on trips to the beauty parlor, appointments with eldercare attorneys, and visits to old friends and relations, her compassionate and insightful nature mostly prevails over her growing frailty and sporadic disorientation. However, when long-familiar faces and places start to seem less so and her once astute observations take surprising, sometimes humorous turns, Rob and Diane become increasingly concerned.
As the beautiful summer gives way to a stark winter and sodden spring, Yvette’s conversations become more and more circular and disjointed, and she occasionally fails to recognize either Rob or his sister—changes that Diane witnesses firsthand and that he encounters on calls from his Cleveland home or while on business trips in Asia and Europe. Still, Yvette’s core personality persists, as evinced by her continuing kindness to all of her acquaintance and her empathy for even those who aren’t—such as, when, hospitalized and delirious, she reacts to Rob’s attempts to distract her with stories of his travels by observing that, wherever they are and however different they might be, most people are, like her, probably just trying to get on with life.
As Yvette’s condition deteriorates, she can’t always distinguish between the present and the past or discern reality from dreams, so past weddings, beach excursions, and other long-ago events begin to haunt her waking hours and complicate her days. Near summer’s end, when Rob and Diane take her on a ride to the beach in the family’s vintage convertible, a ride that she turns into a tour of important places from her youth, they are unable to contain her erratic behavior and struggle to get her home safely before a violent storm. Still, they remain determined to honor her wish to stay in her long-time home—even if the cost of its maintenance causes them to auction off heirlooms and investigate the potential development of its surrounding fields.
Shortly before Columbus Day, however, Yvette experiences a turn for the worse, prompting an urgent visit by Rob and a day of reckoning for him and Diane as they face the likelihood of selling both house and fields to cover the cost of their mother’s long-term care. Flying into Boston just prior to the holiday weekend and caught in stop-and-go northbound traffic, Rob laments the effects of tourism and development on the Maine coast. After he finally arrives at his mother’s house, where she and Diane have already retired for the night, he reflects on how much he’ll miss it and the happy times the family has had there. Over the course of the following day, as he and Diane make room for Yvette’s new hospital bed and she repeatedly confuses a favorite plush toy for a live pet, it becomes plain to both that she will shortly need to move to an extended-care facility and, moreover, will likely soon leave them altogether.
In early evening, when a television program they’re watching touches on death, Rob and Diane are again reminded of their mother’s imminent demise and its attendant changes. Later, Yvette awakes from a nightmare wherein the long-departed beckon to her to join them, and Rob and Diane comfort her with a story about a lost dog who’s found and returned to its master. As Yvette falls back asleep, Rob and Diane close her door behind them, look at the dark landscape outside the hall window and reflect that, like the stars above it, their beloved, addled mother and beautiful, besieged beach town will probably be with them a while longer—at least, in memory if not in fact.
Publisher Name : Rootstock Publishing
Publication Year : 2025
ISBN : 1578691818
Awards or Recognitions : Finalist, American Writing Awards, International Book Awards, Indie Excellence Book Awards. Distinguished Favorite, Independent Press Awards. Honorable Mention, New York, London, and Paris Book Festivals, and the Lorian Hemingway Short Fiction Competition
Reader Testimonials / Reviews :
EDITORIAL REVIEWS
"Conversations With My Mother, a Novel of Dementia on the Maine Coast" will be an emotional read for anyone with a parent that has dementia or the early signs of dementia. The author has portrayed his conversation with his mother as loving, funny and occasionally in a teasing manner when mom gets confused or is forgetful. It does show the author's sister as losing patience with mom, which is truly the case with caregivers for Alzheimer's patients, but she always takes good care of mom. The book is realistic but is not medically oriented. it is very well written and easy to read. I would highly recommend it to anyone facing the issue of dementia in a family member or friend.
GoodReads, March 2025
Author Ronald-Stéphane Gilbert mines his memories to stitch together an empathetic novel inspired by a beloved matriarch's struggle with dementia.
Told in chronological chapters that alternate between brief scenes and lengthy episodes—and revolving around conversations between its characters—the first-person narrative opens with Rob Allaire and his 89-year-old French-Canadian mom, Yvette, outside a seafood restaurant in Maine, once his deceased father's favorite dinner spot; today, it's another painful reminder of Yvette's mortality and her husband's death. Rob lives in Ohio with his wife and son; the distance seems even greater now that Yvette struggles with health problems that require Rob's sister, Diane, to be her live-in caretaker. Motivated by equal parts guilt and deep-rooted love, Rob prioritizes spending more time with Yvette—before Yvette's sense of self is erased.
Yvette's battle with dementia is written as an unpredictable, taxing journey that slowly begins to fuse past and present, challenging her children's ideas about patience, forgiveness, and familial duty. Her transformation isn't sudden, which makes her lapses in memory even more frustrating and heartbreaking. As Yvette worsens, she becomes more childlike and fearful, mistaking vivid nightmares and dreams for real events. Throughout, Rob's perspective emphasizes Yvette's kind heart, which remains, and Rob tries to be a voice of hope and reason—a sharp contrast to his sister's responses to the daily stressors triggered by her domestic role.
Set against the backdrop of New England, this novel is grounded in lived realism. Gilbert doesn't sugarcoat the reality of cognitive decline caused by dementia. However, some readers may yearn for a literary experience that relies on immersive storytelling rather than the novel's conversation-heavy structure. By keeping a tight focus on dialogue revolving around Yvette, there's a missed opportunity to dig deeper into the sibling relationships and build Rob's characterization.
Still, even those whose parents haven't suffered medical hardships will find much to contemplate in this emotionally nuanced depiction of a family forced to reckon with unthinkable circumstances."
BlueInk Review
November 2024
This fictionalized account of the relationship between mother and son as the parent slowly succumbs to dementia is a deeply insightful and engaging work. It is thoughtful, touching, and entirely authentic. The author is a skilled and talented writer whose prose evokes breathtaking emotion in the reader. A truly unique novel from the first page to the last.
BookLife by Publisher's Weekly, May 2023.
Although an eloquently crafted work of fiction (all the more impressive when considering that it is author Ronald-Stephane Gilbert's debut as a novelist), "Conversations with My Mother: A Novel of Dementia on the Maine Coast" competently relates a 'real world' that is experienced by families with a beloved parent is struggling with dementia -- as are their adult children. An inherently fascinating and emotionally engaging read from start to finish, Conversations with My Mother: A Novel of Dementia on the Maine Coast is an especially and unreservedly recommended pick for community library Contemporary Family Life Fiction collections. It should be noted for personal reading lists that this paperback edition of "Conversations with My Mother" . . . is also readily available in a digital book format.
Midwest Book Review and Small Press Bookwatch, February 2025.
This tender, graceful novel highlights the devotion of family as the spark of life begins to fade in a beloved mother suffering from dementia. Gilbert skilfully mirrors the autobiographical tale of his mother's decline with the shifting state of the natural beauty of Maine's coastline amid relentless development. Though frequently heartbreaking, CONVERSATIONS WITH MY MOTHER ultimately glows with the enduring power of love.
Indie Reader, January 2025.
READER REVIEWS
Raes
5.0 out of 5 stars
Little tidbits of conversation show that despite a failing memory and fragility,
Reviewed in the United States on February 5, 2025
a moms heart still keeps her connected to those she loves. Easy to read a chapter and return when you have time. Modern day situations and a senior citizen's reaction to it is
A.Ahuvia
5.0 out of 5 stars
Authentic, heartfelt, and often quite funny
Reviewed in the United States on January 31, 2025
This book will be enjoyed by any memoir fan looking for honesty, humor, and human insight. It's also nicely structured into a series of bite-sized pieces that fit well into our busy lives.
"sprachnroll"
5.0 out of 5 stars
Comedy and Tragedy in Losing a Parent
Reviewed in the United States on December 31, 2024
"Conversations..." will resonate with anyone who has lost a beloved parent either to dementia, as in this case, or simply due to the aging process. It vividly captures with equal amounts of pathos and humor the feeling of impending loss and the preciousness of having a limited time left with one's parent. The location is coastal Maine and its association with vacation pleasures, as well as with the decline of a previous generation of industry, creates a backdrop
West Coast Big Al
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Charming Family Portrait with Wit and Humor
Reviewed in the United States on November 22, 2024
A charming family portrait with a good dose of wit and humor! Don't be put off by the subtitle: this book is a celebration of every stage of life. Each chapter has a witty insight from Mom, showing her true self. The book leaves a powerful impression of what goes into caring for a loved one who is aging.
DHS
5.0 out of 5 stars
An Uplifting and Intriguing Journey
Reviewed in the United States on November 30, 2024
Conversations with my Mother is rich with vivid details, deep insights, and vibrant characters. The author draws us into his unfolding family dynamics and adds splashes of humor to his beautifully-written story.
Gabrielle
November 11, 2024
I received a copy of this book free in exchange for my honest review. This book was beautifully written and the author did a very good job conveying emotion.
Jill
March 10, 2025
This book will be an emotional read for anyone with a parent that has dementia or the early signs of dementia. The author has portrayed his conversation with his mother as loving, funny and occasionally in a teasing manner when mom gets confused or is forgetful. It does show the author's sister as losing patience with mom, which is truly the case with caregivers forAlzheimer's patients, but she always takes good care of mom. The book is realistic but is not medically oriented. it is very well written and easy to read. I would highly
Jennifer
November 12, 2024
This is a novel about a lady with worsening dementia. It is in the point of view of her eldest son who, although lives elsewhere, visits regularly in order to help his sister who has been charged with her care. Although, heavily based on real life, this is a work of fiction.
I really enjoy novels like these, those without a real plot, but focus on a character or characters and how they change and grow over time. It was heartbreaking to watch the mom progress from forgetting a little but being aware, to completely lost. The sense of frustration from the sister who was there day in and day out was undeniable, albeit infuriating. She quickly lost all empathy and patience, which as mad as it made me to read, was probably so incredibly accurate. The feeling of uselessness that the main character felt and his feeling of loosing control were understandable as well. It was very obvious the author wrote from a place of personal experience and he did an excellent job of portraying that through these pages.
This is written like a memoir. Each chapter has a title and then a subtitle of Short Take, Medium Take, or Long Take to give the reader an idea of how long the chapter will be. I found this delightful. I like the differing lengths of the chapters. I did not really care for most of the Long Takes though, especially toward the end. These long takes were sometimes 40 pages long! That is a bit much, especially without breaks within the chapter. For the type of book this was (not plot driven) choosing to have a 40 page chapter makes the book drag on and all it did was make me loose interest. Also, it was inconsistent. The difference between a Short and Medium take was maybe a page, but from Medium to Long was more than 30 pages. That is really my only struggle with this book, but it really affected my ability to enjoy the novel as a whole.
I would still highly recommend.
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Keera Kongnyuy
April 17, 2025
What an excellent book this is! The author weaves a beautiful narrative that examines the complex relationship between mother and son, aging, and the human experience. The writing is evocative and engaging, with richly drawn characters—the mother and son—whose dynamics are at the story's heart. Characters are unforgettable, especially Yvette, who suffers from dementia, and following her through interactions with her son is intriguing.
The mother’s struggles with dementia act as a catalyst for exploring profound themes around identity and memory. The son’s perspective offers a nuanced and compassionate lens through which we witness his mother’s experiences, showcasing their bond. The author’s lyrical and precise language employs various literary devices that enhance the atmosphere and mood, making each page a treasure.
Several key scenes stand out, such as the mother’s preparation for her friend Pat’s funeral, which beautifully contrasts her love and devotion against the backdrop of her fading memories. Despite some readers possibly finding the pacing slow or the themes of aging intense, the book's exploration of memory evokes a rich tapestry of human emotion. Overall, this beautifully written work is a moving exploration of life, making it a must-read for anyone who appreciates literary fiction or family dramas. It will leave readers reflecting long after they turn the final page. I enjoyed the first-person narrative voice, ingeniously executed in the present tense, giving the work a powerful sense of urgency.
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Christian Sia
April 17, 2025
Ronald-Stéphane Gilbert's Conversations with My Mother is a touching and beautifully crafted narrative that speaks to the universal experience of aging and the complexities of memory. Through a series of vignettes, the story revolves around Yvette, a warm-hearted matriarch suffering from dementia, and her reflective son, who navigates their evolving relationship amid the backdrop of a changing town. The opening scene at the breakwater, where Yvette reminisces about love and her husband's proposal, sets a nostalgic tone that resonates throughout the book, highlighting their enduring bond.
Gilbert's writing is rich and evocative, capturing the humor and pathos of Yvette's situation. As she grapples with her fading memories, the author cleverly infuses Yvette’s sharp observations— “I must be at the ‘Stairway to Heaven’”—with moments of levity, showcasing her unyielding spirit. The exploration of family dynamics is poignant; the story deftly balances moments of joy against the sorrow of loss. The delicate interplay between past and present is a backdrop for Yvette’s struggles and a poignant reminder of the beauty of fleeting memories. Gilbert’s skill in character development makes this debut a resounding success that lingers with readers long after the last page is turned.
Tom Hudak
December 31, 2024
"Conversations..." will resonate with anyone who has lost a beloved parent either to dementia, as in this case, or simply due to the aging process. It vividly captures with equal amounts of pathos and humor the feeling of impending loss and the preciousness of having a limited time left with one's parent. The location is coastal Maine and its association with vacation pleasures, as well as with the decline of a previous generation of industry, creates a backdrop that reinforces the main story.
Author Website: https://www.ronaldstephanegilbert.com
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